InsiderNJ has named Senator Weinberg and me “Godparents of the LGBT community” in the 2018 Insider Out 100: LGBT Power List, an honor we cherish.

Senator Weinberg and I sponsored Marriage Equality for same sex couples prompted by advocates, gay and straight, for the fundamental right for same sex couples to marry. We faced an uphill battle. Fierce opposition came from the Catholic and Baptist Church and the Orthodox Jewish Community.

Despite this opposition, Loretta and I insisted on Marriage Equality for our gay brothers and sisters. When our legislation was before the Senate Judiciary Committee, Steven Goldstein, founder of Garden State Equality secured the testimony of Civil Rights icon Julian Bond who stated, “My gay brothers and sisters marched alongside me for my civil rights. I came here from Atlanta to support their civil right to marry.” On December 7, 2009, our legislation was released from committee with a 7-6 vote. 

On January 9, 2010, Same Sex Marriage was posted for a vote in the State Senate. Hundreds of supporters, gay and straight allies, packed the State House hoping and praying to receive the 21 votes necessary to pass.

We were hoping for a miracle that didn’t come – perhaps a child of a Senator coming out to his or her parent and asking for an affirmative vote. We left no stone unturned. Senator Diane Allen, one of two Republican supporters, was recovering from cancer surgery and couldn’t come to the Senate Chamber to cast her vote. We arranged for a sterilized ambulance to take her to the Statehouse parking garage where the Senate Rules allowed her to cast her vote by proxy in the event we got close to the 21 votes needed.

We didn’t get close. We had two Senators who committed to being the 20th and 21st vote, if we got to 19. We only got to 14 – one Republican, Senator Baroni, and 13 of 24 Democrats.

Before the Senate Democratic caucus broke from  its closed door deliberations, a Senator known as a prominent liberal (“Progressive” wasn’t used back in 2008) asked me, “Why are you making us vote for this,” knowing we didn’t have the votes to pass it. I shook my head disappointed by the lack of compassion and commitment from a fellow liberal.

Senator Weinberg and I decided we had to have a vote – that although the gay and straight allies who packed the Senate gallery would be disappointed with the likely result, not having a vote would be more disappointing, and would leave everyone with an empty feeling – not even getting a vote on a Human Right fundamental to their beings as gay men and women.

Ray Lesniak is the former LD20 Senator.